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Friday, December 18, 2009

Super Powers




I'm on the tail end of what I'm hoping is just a 24 hour flu bug. I will whole heartedly admit I don't make a good sick person. When I'm nauseous I'm miserable. And I'm sure that I whine a lot.

So last night as I was curled up in bed, trying to keep my clothes and the blankets from touching me because my skin hurt, Brian was folding laundry on the bed, trying to keep me company. He commented that the clothes were much more static-ee than normal. I should mention, before I get to this next part, that when I'm sick, I'm a little punchy.

The first thought that popped into my head was, "Maybe I'm getting super powers!"

That's right. A little bit of a leap. I jumped right over the obvious explanation of "weather patterns" and went straight to the realm of science fiction ("The influx of powers coursing into my body is causing the unusually high amount of static electricity in the air!!)

Why not. I felt like crap and this was helping.

Who wouldn't sacrifice 24 hours of nauseousness for some superpowers?

Then to further divert my attention from my fever, I launched into a brainstorming session of what super powers I would want to become a Super Mom. I know that most super heroes only have one main power, but moms are supposed to be able to multi-task, so I want a whole range of super powers.

Here they are, in no particular order:

1. I would require only a few short hours of sleep. (I tried for no sleep, but Brian interjected that I would want some down time with him.)

2. I would have a deep love for cleaning and organizing along with a great motivation to do so.

3. I would always be patient and never have the desire to lose my temper with my kids or slow people.

4. I would have an extremely fast metabolism that would make it almost necessary to indulge regularly in chocolate.
(side bar: as I'm brainstorming these outlandish and recognizably make-believe powers, Brian is of course giving his practical opinion on these matters. Things like, "Well you wouldn't need a high metabolism because you won't be requiring much sleep, so you can get up early and exercise..." Oh, Brian. You don't get it, do you?)

5. I would be able to point to any recipe and VOILA! it would be prepared faster than you can say, "Martha has a whole staff that does that for her!". No shopping. No prep time. No clean up.

6. I would be able to stop time any time I wanted to.

Now this brought the converstations to a grinding halt, because I have always fantasized about this super power. Who hasn't. (Remember that Saturday morning show "Out of this World" where Evie is half alien and can stop time?) And it really made me think. If I had this one superpower, would I really need all the rest? Of course Brian had some practical bankers advice about this, but I decided I needed to come to my own conclusions about this one.

Which was:

7. No doing laundry. Ever.

What super powers would you like?
the picture is two of my little super heroes with their Super Nana

6 comments:

Annessa B. said...

I'm sorry you were so sick. I hope you're feeling better now.

AS for the laundry, maybe you just forgot the drier sheet? Too much thinking for me.

What's Next said...

Hope you are feeling better!

I have said time and time again my superpower would be teleporting. I know I am not a mom yet, but wouldn't it be great to be able to deliver kids to their destination instantly? Never need a car, or a plane ticket... it would be eco friendly anyway. And think how much time and money it would save.

Lisa said...

The Irony...I was just telling someone how I fantasize about having Evie's power to stop time. Think of the possibilities! Sleeping in, time to exercise, blogging undisturbed, pausing a fight from my kids until I'm ready to deal with it, you wouldn't have to start dinner until Dad was walking in then just pause time and cook a hot meal and unfreeze everyone with dinner on the table, not ready for the bus yet would not be a problem....the possibilities astound me!

Can you tell Ive thought about this!?!

I wonder what got everyone sick? John, Caleb, Davis, and Lisa R all got sick too...

Grandma Caroline said...

I just realized that you got what John, SB, Caleb, & Davis had! I'm so sorry you got sick here, but the rest of us didn't. What's with that? Hope you feel better soon.

V and Co. said...

the ability to *think* my house clean, dinner to be made, and well basically anything i wanted.

btw brian...
seriously dude.
listen,
forget the muscle-y men in movies being our fantasies, it's all about the chocolate, not needing to exercise and the ability to look so amazingly hot, that wind automatically starts blowing our hair the minute we stand up and everyone goes in slow motion as you pass, all the while the song "i just died in your arms tonight" is playing in the background...that my friend is what we women fantasize about.
i'm just saying...
;)-V
ps:now that would be a super cool super power as well, except that i would get pretty tired of that song.

Mark and/or Lisa said...

Freeze time fo shizzle